Midnight Musings

Posted on Sat Mar 23rd, 2024 @ 3:53pm by Lieutenant Commander Kevin Lance

Mission: Thunderdome
Location: USS Chuck Norris
Timeline: Before Home

on:
{Executive Officer’s Quarters, Deck One}

Kevin was unable to sleep. He was acutely aware that less than a month ago, Mira had slept in this bunk. That wasn’t the reason for his insomnia but it didn’t help matters any. Wryly he thought that this is the closest that he had ever gotten to getting in her bed and yet there was a child out there that shared their DNA. He rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling. It was no good. He was never going to get any sleep while this hung over him.

“One problem at a time,” he told himself, “Follow the evidence.”

First, it was unlikely that the DNA test was incorrect so he had to accept that Kolar was the DNA child of himself and Mira.

Second, Mira had taken some measure of responsibility for the child, naming and placing him in a secure and stable family that she could trust but stopped short of raising the child herself. It showed concern for him but mostly a pragmatic attitude that the Chuck Norris was no place to raise a child, a sentiment with which he wholeheartedly agreed.

Third, the situation had changed from when Kolar was “born” three months ago. Assignment to the Starbase presented a much more stable situation for a child, one that Kronnelti’s family was taking full advantage of.

Fourth, despite Mira’s assurance that nothing had to change, everything had changed. Mira’s responsibility for Kolar was now shared by himself, from a moral standpoint if not a legal one.

Fifth, Kolar did not change Kevin’s feelings towards Mira, even when Rodriguez was his DNA father. Now that Kevin was Kolar’s DNA father, his feelings towards Mira remained unchanged.

He sat up in bed, crossed his legs and rested his forearms on his knees. So what did the evidence tell him?

Regardless of Kolar’s parentage, Kevin was falling in love with Mira. If Mira planned to bring Kolar to Starbase 364, he would become as much a part of Kevin’s life as he hoped Mira would be. He would have been faced with a similar conundrum had Kolar been the son of Mira’s deceased husband. But seemingly against all odds, Kevin felt something paternal towards Kolar.

He had never wanted children when the concept of fatherhood was an abstract concept. Now that it was becoming and unexpected reality, he felt an unexpected duty to be the father to Kolar that he had never had. And perhaps through Kolar, Kevin and Mira could find a way to make peace with their own childhoods.

“Computer,” Kevin ordered in the dark, “Prepare a message for Captain Rodale.”

“Mira. I wanted to apologize for the way that I responded in the Mess Hall today. The complications surrounding Kolar’s parentage are well known to me, of course, but the sudden and shocking revelation of his DNA or rather my DNA left me confused and frightened. In that state, I am afraid that I acted very poorly.”

“I never wanted to be a father and I am inadequately trained and equipped to successfully engage in such an endeavor. But if duty and honor require, I will do my best to be the father to Kolar that neither you nor I ever had.”

“The decision to bring Kolar to live with you is yours alone. Whatever your decision, know that I will stand by you. As your Executive Officer. As your Friend. And as…well…whatever we are becoming to each other.”

He paused to decide on an adieu that expressed his deep feeling but did not sound sappy. In the end, he decided to go with a simple, “Loving You, Kevin”

“Computer, end message.”

“Do you wish to send, save or delete,” the computer asked.

For a moment, Kevin considered deleting the message and hiding his true feelings behind a mask of duty. He steeled himself, however, and finally said, “Send.”

“Message sent to Captain Rodale.”

Kevin laid back on the bunk hoping that at last sleep would come. It would not, however, because now his mind was occupied with how quickly Mira would respond and what she would say.

:off

Lieutenant Commander Kevin Lance
Executive Officer
USS Chuck Norris