A Night in Lockup

Posted on Thu Oct 31st, 2024 @ 3:26pm by Commander Kevin Lance
Edited on on Thu Oct 31st, 2024 @ 6:17pm

Mission: Starbase 364
Location: Starbase 364
Timeline: Current

on:
{Starbase 364 Brig}

Kevin laid on his back staring up at the ceiling of the containment cell that he had been placed in after assaulting Captain Rashard in the Admiral's dining room. Normally reserved and under firm control of his emotions, he had no idea what had inspired him to such violence. The thought that Rashard had tortured Mira in captivity combined with Kevin's own feelings of inadequacy in their recent relationship were a volatile mixture. It had only needed the spark of Rashard's snide comment after Mira's departure to set Kevin ablaze.

Rashard would survive the attack, thanks to the Admiral and the Ambassador's aide, but Kevin wasn't sure that his career would. Assaults between Star Fleet officers were very rare and the penalties could be very draconian. He could lose rank and his position. Be reassigned to another post or cashiered entirely. A lengthy incarceration wasn't out of the realm of possibility either. All of those punishments paled in comparison to the thought of permanent separation from Mira and the children.

His younger self would have never thought that being loved and having a family was anything but the wildest dream. Yet he had found it, albeit by an extremely unconventional route, and it was part of him now. Losing it would be like having a good chunk of his soul removed. He tried to imagine a happy future but all was obscured by the desolation of his failures.

The Odinkus had a pessimistic belief that happiness, peace and contentment were abnormal situations and that one needed to revel in them to the fullest in anticipation that the "gods" would eventually take it all way. Kevin felt the fullness of that belief now and sorely wished that he would have taken greater advantage of the gifts when they had been offered.

He rolled onto his side as he continued to contemplate. That was the whole purpose of enforced confinement. To give a person time to consider and regret their actions. Whether a young child forced to stand in a corner or the constraints of old age and infirmity, time was given for reflection.

Sleep eventually overtook his brooding but it was not restful bliss.

He dreamt that he was in a wide open park. Mira played with Vay'toc and an older Kolar in the distance as he held a four-year old Ashla on his hip. She was laughing and playing with a flowered garland in her auburn tresses. Kevin was content and happy.

Then Ashla disappeared from his arm. Kevin looked around desperately but she was no where to be seen. He tried to call out her name but his voice would not come. He was about to run to Mira when he caught the glimpse of a woman out of the corner of his eye.

She had, to his mind, appeared as suddenly as his daughter had disappeared. She was about half a decade younger than himself with long red hair. She was holding a baby in her arms and instinctively Kevin knew that the baby was Ashla. He still couldn't speak but was able to move towards the woman.

She looked at him with blue eyes that were so familiar. Eyes that stared back at him from the mirror every morning when he shaved. He knew that he should know her but couldn't quite recall her name. The woman's gaze seemed to stop him in his tracks.

"She is a very beautiful child," the woman complimented, "So much more that you deserve."

"Give me back my daughter," Kevin finally found his voice.

"You have taken so much from me," the woman accused him, "you would deny me this one chance to meet my niece?"

Recognition descended upon Kevin immediately. "Ashla?" he asked.

The woman did not acknowledge him but instead said, "You will fail her. Just as you failed me. Just as you fail everyone. Brother."

The woman was replaced by a six-year old girl with a sickly complexion and limp red hair. Her sunken eyes looked accusingly at Kevin. "You left me behind."

"You were too sick," Kevin replied weakly.

"You are strong," the accusation continued, "You could have carried me. You promised to always care for me and then you left. Like you always do. Like you always will."

The guilt that he had kept at bay for so long came crashing down on him. The ground under him became unstable and he fell to his knees.

"You are failing them too," his sister pointed to Mira and Kolar, "You had better run before you hurt them more...or worse."

"Ashla! NO!" Kevin screamed.

Then he was awake in the detention cell again. He was breathing hard and his heart hammered in his chest. He had a fleeting image of a red headed woman holding Ashla and a foreboding sense of impending doom.

He laid back on the bunk and covered his eyes with his arm. He tried to recall the dream but it wouldn't come to him. Neither did sleep.

:off

Commander (?) Kevin Lance
Executive Officer
USS Chuck Norris